TO WHOM IT MAY CONCERN

 Dr Frog is driven completely batty when the only size options are "medium" or "large". How can it be a medium then? It can't be a medium unless it is the MEDIAN between extremes. I believe the term you are looking for is SMALL. You offer a "large" and a "small". Please adjust all advertising and signs so that you will no longer look a idiot, and I no longer have to be party to your idiocy so I can order.

 That is all.